The compatibility of these vectors in personal relationship
The union of red and violet vector is quite rare case, but very extraordinary. These two vectors are living in a kind of different worlds, or rather, on different “layers” of the world. The list of contradictions is not less than the red with orange have. Here are some of them:
- Activity – Passivity
- Hot biochemistry – Cold biochemistry
- The desire to be seen – the desire to be in the shade
- The drive for luxury – Satisfaction with the minimum comfort
- Pressing the situation – Adjusting to the situation
Speaking about personal relationship, Violet man has the main motive, which connects these people in a couple. Of course, it is an odor. Red people are always “smelly”: this is due to their particular metabolism, the pace of life, lack of attention to detail. It is clear that in daily life violets shun such people. However, if Red has “that” smell, which violet always dreamed about, he does everything in his power to live next to his “dream”.
This pair can exist in harmony a quite long time. Violets need only one thing to be happy: they wish their lovers were near around. Saying “near” I mean it literary. Due to the ability to adapt, Violet man can tolerate many stunts of Red partner. It doesn’t mean that he is ready to forget all stunts till the rest of the life, but if he is in love, he will do it. Even when the red one is “crossing the line”, his violet partner won’t break up with him.
Do you remember Mimi? She is the maim character of the film “Bitter Moon” by Roman Polanski (“Bitter Moon”, Roman Polanski, 1992):
“Do what you want, Oscar. Sleep with whom you want. Just let me be, with you!”.
But if the love union is finally crushing, the violet partner can act vice versa. In the moment of breakup, he are ready to "restore the balance”. It will be a true revenge – he’ll get more what he asked for. Interestingly, such “feedback” can make the red partner to respect his partner for the first time, but sometimes it’s too late…
Oscar (a few months later): “Oh, Lord, what a shit I was. I despise myself. I hate myself even more than you hate me”.
Mimi: “Do not flatter yourself, Oscar. No one can hate you more than I do”.
But it was a point of “violet’s” view. And what about the red one? Why does he need such relationship?
One of the most important thing for the Red person is sense of his status and authority. Moreover, this vector is characterized by a hidden self-doubt complex. Therefore, the violet partner, perhaps, the only one person who can deal with very thin “gentle places” of his urethral partner.
He knows how to emphasize important moments for the Red and diplomatically bypass the critical moments that can “push his buttons”.
Violet partner has a huge numbers of means to raise urethral dignity to the skies, but at the same time, he can unleash it to nothing – with a word, a look or a gesture.
Can you imagine what kind of life the Red partner has in such relationship? On the one hand, he feels on the top – he can realize his potential, and it's pretty cool. On the other hand, he understands that his success isn’t up to himself, but to living next his violet partner. But who knows what will be on his mind tomorrow…
By the way, despite the fact that the love to a certain smell is quite stable, a violet man can stop loving the flavor, which was once so eager. Although the smell of his red partner may change (by changing diet and lifestyle, in case of various diseases, etc.). Violet loses interest to the partner – and, moreover, the red partner irritates him by actions, words, appearance… by "stink", in the end...
There is nothing that can save such union of two people. This couple is doomed. But, given the above, urethral partner usually more worries about breakup then his violet partner.
The compatibility of these vectors in one single man
The combination of red and violet in one person is one of the most complex. This person since early childhood suffers from irreconcilable differences, which are not resolved harmoniously way. Usually it looks like realization of one vector’s needs to the detriment of another. So what do you think, what vector “wins” more often?
Let's look at the main areas of implementation of the urethral vector Also let’s consider the impact of violet vector on them.
Typical red man, as they say, literary wants “everything that moves”. He is genetically inclined to a polygamy (changeability in partnership) and the search for new experiences. But, if beneath the red, there is also violet vector with high level of defining – this person doesn’t even think about new partner. Of course, I'm talking about the situation when he has already found his beloved with the most wonderful and desired smell. Then he draw all his sexual potential on his partner, enjoying every breath (actually, exhalation) and greedily catching all the variety of natural scents, which his partner has in intimate situations.
If urethral vector feel an orgasm only in the area of genitals, than the combination of red and violet can feel the pleasure, which permeates the whole body and even goes beyond it (the so-called “tantric orgasm”).
But when violet one still is looking for a partner with the smell he dreams about, he lives in constant stress. As soon as he will smell something alluring in a potential partner, he is ready to have sex with him, subconsciously hoping that the smell will reveal all the aromatic bouquet, and – here is the magic! – the smell will be exactly he dreamed about.
But this happens too rarely to be a rule. Therefore, there are many fails one by one…
2. Tend to risk.
This quality, if adults did not pressure it in childhood, is pushing the red man to the most daring and rash decisions – and exactly this quality allows him to get to the highest level in the work, business and creativity. What could prevent? Alas, it is accompanying olfactory (a very sensitive nose). Violet vector always says: “It is dangerous! You don’t know what you're going through! Stop it, changed your mind! Do you remember the last time you did not listen to me?”. Violet vector is too scary to move beyond the traditional. This inner “violet” voice drowns all “red” impulses. It’s too difficult to resist.
The only advice that could be in this situation is to implement the “violet” potential in another area. For example, to spend a lot of time in pleasant smells or to smell the beloved’s armpits. So, it will be much safer to treat red vector wildness. He’ll become stuck in his case only when it absolutely necessary.
3. The desire for power.
This conflict is even worse than previous. Red vector enjoys to power over people so much! His heart bursts with the adrenaline fire, when he’s in plain sight, or better, in front of all on a horse - and he leads his team in a bright future. No doubt, just go!
And then, here you are... Some little worm deep inside whispers: it is necessary to hide, you shouldn’t be so harsh…
Violet vector is not in favor of policy management, he is a clever and cunning politician who knows the true motives of people. That’s why he knows all the secret levers. But how he could implement them unless everybody sees you?
“Red” and “Violet” mood can shift several times in month, a week or even a day. At some moment, the man got out on the platform or stage, suddenly realizes that he wants to hide from everyone, he doesn’t want to lead – he is just sitting in secluded place, gently twitching his sensitive nose and watching what’s happening.
The compatibility of these vectors in business
The conflict between red and violet vectors in business is fed by their mutual dependence on each other. “Red” would be glad to get rid of the “power dater” in his team. But the “red” one realizes that he can easily get into some trouble without the “violet” one in his business. And you know, all “reds” are afraid of this so much! Namely, if people find out that his great leader had strayed from the path. It means that his credibility will be compromised. That’s why he is forced to endure a “power dater” next to him, who often literary saves him in a difficult situations.
But the Violet “power dater” isn’t a fool. He also wants to exert a great power, but he prefers to be in the shadows. He may well accept the position of Chief Accountant or Chief of Stuff. Alternatively, at least, the head of the security service. “Violet” goal is to managing resources (human, financial, information), but he wants to be always discreetly standing behind “Red” leader. Here we see that every “violet” needs his own “red”, because only the red partner can realize “violet” ideas and to be responsible for them.
Of course, it would be better to “meet” the yellow vector for such aim. “Yellow” always tends to take a leadership position, but he doesn’t know what to do with the position. Such “competition” makes “red” nervous – he is aware of the ambiguity of the situation. That’s why he decides to “keep under constant view the Violet”. What for?
- Firstly, you need to clearly limit the area of “violet” influence (every “violet” would be glad to weave a web at different levels of the company or business).
- Secondly, you must give him real powers. Otherwise - he will take, and you will not even notice.
- It is important to remember that the Violet will always be looking for “backup plan”, no matter how satisfied with the work. It is natural “violet” quality. And this it what every head should remember about when he is hiring Violet worker.
- Some managers prefer creative, but very risky option: to make two Violet people a heads of two different business. Despite the weirdness of this idea, it works well: all spheres of influence are divided, also the heads control each other. But if they make a union… – it means that Red leader is going to get into serious trouble.
Violet wife and Red husband in a business
It is very important to understanding and accepting the situation by both partners. If a red man, despite all of his charisma and great leadership skills, are agree with the fact that his Violet wife runs a business, but not he (it’s true), the things is going well. His wife will do everything in order to others think that he directs everything. But if he does not know who is deciding things, and only wants to use the quality of his Violet wife, he'll face disappointment.
This case is reflected in the classic movie "Ghost" by Roman Polanski (“The Ghost Writer”, Roman Polanski, 2010). Urethral British Prime Minister, dividing the bed with his wife and secretary at the same time, in fact, is only a puppet in the hands of his wife (CIA agent). Both partners were fine with that, but on the other hand, two of them were full of hate and grudge to each other. But the Leader and his “Power Dater” hid their feeling from each other.
Red parents and Violet child
Imagine red parents: they are full of energy, they are fast, successful – they look confidently to the future. Whether they are businessmen or astronauts, urethral vector makes them bright and remarkable. Moreover, they are ready to pass this life energy to their newborn child, which (as always, suddenly) should appear in their family. Well, the baby was born, and parents are looking to his eyes with trembling. And what are they seeing? Alas, it is not what they expected...
Instead of the joy of life, the small violet baby’s face expresses set of some emotions, which can hardly be named positive. He doesn’t like the smell of his mom and dad: it is some sweet-bitter flavor of “red” pheromones, which is not washed off by any soaps (violet-vectored readers will understand me well). He does not like their pace of life – they’re smelling even more when they move faster and faster. He does not like that he always has to move somewhere: as soon as he has adapted to surrounding smells, his parents decided to move on the other flat/country etc. Then he has to adapt to new smells again. This situations last forever. And the baby rightly or wrongly starts thinking how to manage this crazy movement of life, which sometimes makes his nose anxious pinches.
A few months later, the violet baby will understand that his parents are ready to do anything, just to see a rare smile on his dissatisfied face. And, the first phase of the relations in the family begins. It is manipulation. The baby, what they called, twists parents round his little finger. Red mom and dad accustomed to manage their life, find themselves caught in the muddy "game" of their child, and they just don’t know what to do. Sometimes the big conflict arises even between wife and husband because of this child “games”. And the main problem here is to hold boundaries.
For example, if a red (or black, or yellow) child oversteps, he does it clearly and vigorously – It is easy to recognize and easy to stop: “Hey, man, do not talk this way to your parents!”. But this violet baby will overstep so smoothly and quietly that it seems to be nothing to swear. Parents think that much easier to get away with his behavior than explain to him all the subtleties and nuances. But that is the problem! After some time you notice that it is hard to tell who controls the life of your family – you or your little child. And then the second phase of relations begins. It is rejection.
Parents get well that they’re powerless to make her child happy (in their "urethral" representation). Preservation of themselves, their goals and values in life is becoming their main task. They are fenced off from the child who looks with pessimism at all their grand plans and goals. He really does not get the meaning of huge amount of money, social status, fame and other general attributes of urethral lifestyle – not to mention the constant need to implement an unprecedented sexual energy. “We do not touch you, and you do not touch us” – that is the most common model of relationship in such family, especially when the child becomes a teenager.
But if parents could establish contact with the child and accepted his violet vector, despite the global differences in the perception of the world, their relationship can go into the third phase - cooperation. Red parents notice that their child sometimes very accurately predicts some events (especially negative), and if they don’t pressure on him and don’t expect unusual actions and reactions from him, it is possible to communicate with him. Although this “language” will be very unusual for red parent. But perhaps, this is the meaning of the vector system - tools for building parent-child relationship.
Violet parents and Red child
It is difficult for Violet parents to decide on childbirth. They used to live in a well-established smells, and are wary of future changes in the family. Violet woman usually anticipates that during pregnancy her sense of smell will be changed. Moreover, her own smells may seem unusual to her. But she couldn’t even imagine SUCH change! Living in her womb urethral kid smells (no, stinks!) right NOW – she feels this smell through the shell, separating the baby from the surrounding world.
What happens after the birth? Maternal instinct will take over in 75%, and the smell of her child, whatever it will be, will be acceptable for the mother - at least for a first few years. But we can’t say the same about the Violet dad: he generally would be happy to avoid the obligation to care for the baby, who are too smelly. After 4-5 months (!) he already has pheromones unlike other babies of his age who can’t be called Violet.
And what about the last 25%? They are not "lucky". These babies will not get that mother warmth and tenderness. But honestly, red children less than others are addicted to gentle physical contact with their parents, although, of course, everything is relative.
By the way, if you don’t like the smell of your baby, do not cheat in on "red-violet" combination. I have often encounter clients (men and women) who have a deep (long lasted) rejection of the child. This rejection expressed through the rejection of his smell. But the true reason laid much deeper than the system of vectors.
But it is not just the smell is a problem in the relationship violet parents with red children. They hardly find an approach to the parenting for their child, who lives his life as he wishes. And of course, he doesn’t intend to obey his parents. He already has enough charisma (to 2-3 years) to get from sensitive parents what he really needs. What should parents do in such harsh conditions? It is clear that they should use the usual way of interacting with people - manipulation. Fortunately, it works perfectly with the red one.
But such way makes the red child crazy. His extraordinary and bright energy constrains by unclear boundaries and limits, which exist and don’t exist at the same time – this is exact how red people describe their childhood. And all of this manipulations leads to emotional instability. Violet families will get me.
Nevertheless, the red child has two ways. The first one is to pressure his red vector embedding in “violet” limits. The second one is to separate emotionally and energetically, and live his own life. Of course, the second option is possible only with adolescence (but some children come to this option only by the age of thirty).
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